Never Be The Same
by PlainJaneIam
Summary: M/S. "After loving you, I can never be the same"


**Based on the song 'Never Be The Same' by Red**

**I don't own it or WAT.**

A/N: Sorry this took so long to get to you, I had a whole other chapter written, but I just didn't like it. So, I rewrote it. Hope you like it. Thanks for reading and reviewing

A/N: This is the third and final part to 'The Difficult Kind' and 'From Where You Are'

**:::::**

**Never Be The Same**

His heart was breaking all over again.

The woman he loved more than life itself had torn his hopeful heart to shreds. Never in a million years would he have imagined it happening. Not again. Not after all the time he'd spent waiting for her.

His heart longed for her. Longed for her touch. Longed for the sight of her. For too long he'd been without her. Memories were all he had left of her. Everywhere he looked, everything he did was a reminder of her, of a time they shared together.

The memory of her haunted him. His heart dropped each time he walked into the office, saw her desk covered in someone else's belongings. Even his home felt foreign to him now.

At night his dreams were consumed by her. That's where his mind was truly allowed to wander, to remember everything he'd given up. His subconscious mind was continually focused on her. On her smile, her laugh, her eyes.

Morning was both the best and worst time of his day. For those few minutes, it was like she was still there. Her skin underneath his fingertips, her breath on his skin. He could feel her.

_I know you, who are you now?  
Look into my eyes if you can't remember.  
Do you remember, oh?_

I can see, I can still find  
You're the only voice my heart can recognize  
But I can't hear you now, yeah.

Now, though, he wasn't sure what he felt.

Everyone had warned him about her. Told him not to get his hopes up, it'd only bring him pain in the end. But he couldn't believe them. She put up a tough exterior, kept everyone at arm's length, but somehow he broke through it and got to see her, the real Samantha Spade. And she had him absolutely mesmerized.

But, it didn't last long. As soon as she realized how close he was to her heart, she set to work rebuilding the fortress around it, pushing him away in the process.

He still didn't know exactly where things went wrong. Before he knew it, their entire relationship had crashed and burned and left them both brokenhearted.

Why he thought it'd work a second time, he didn't know. But seeing her again had struck a fire within him, and he was determined to win her back.

His plan didn't exactly work out the way he'd envisioned it though.

_I'll never be the same  
I'm caught inside the memories, the promises  
are yesterdays and I belong to you.  
I just can't walk away  
'cause after loving you  
I can never be the same._

After the lecture ended earlier that day, he weaved his way through the sea of people with one thing in mind, Samantha.

He caught sight of her golden blonde hair as she disappeared into the hotel lounge. The sight he was met with as he followed her nearly crippled him.

She was wrapped tightly in the arms of a man. One of the men from her team, Martin noticed, James something. Her brown eyes caught sight of him standing in the archway just as the other man pressed his lips gently to her temple.

He quickly averted his gaze as his heart clenched painfully in his chest. He forced away the urge to beat the guy to a bloody pulp while words of warning rang in his ears. Maybe he should have listened to them.

"Martin?" Her soft voice called, breaking him from the trance he was in. She was standing directly in front of him, the other guy had disappeared, he wasn't sure to where. He refused to meet her eyes, afraid of what he'd inevitably see in them: pity, regret, grief, guilt. His feet remained planted on the floor despite his internal demand for them to flee. "Martin, I-"

"No. You don't have to explain. I get it." He interrupted her, avoiding whatever she had in mind to justify what he'd seen. His blue eyes finally settled on hers hoping to seem genuine, but he could tell she wasn't buying it. She could read him like a book.

"It isn't what it looks like." She said, resting her hand lightly on his forearm. The simple gesture made his heart thump wildly in his chest. His eyes slipped shut as he tried to compose himself and calm his racing heart. No other woman had ever made him into such a love-struck mess.

"Sam, really. You don't owe me an explanation." He pulled away from her touch, giving her a small smile. Reluctantly he turned away from her and left the room.

He felt detached from himself as he made his way up to his room. Silence engulfed the tiny space where he laid face down in the pillows atop his bed.

She was seeing someone.

It was silly to think that she'd been single the entire time she was in Texas, but for some reason, Martin had allowed himself to believe it. Not once had he stopped to think that maybe unlike him she'd been able to move on, to find someone else.

This whole time he'd been alone waiting for the day he'd be with her again. He'd held an irrational, selfish hope that she'd been waiting too.

He'd tricked himself into believing that despite the many miles and unspoken issues between them, they'd somehow find their way back to one another.

They'd get another chance.

_And how can I pretend I've never known you?  
Like it was all a dream, no.  
I know I'll never forget  
the way I always felt with you beside me  
and how you loved me then, yeah._

After laying in the deafening silence for what seemed like hours, he'd made up his mind. There was no way he was letting her go this time. It didn't matter that she was dating someone else. She belonged with him. She always had and always would.

He marched to the ninth floor where he knew she was staying. His feet took him to room 907, and before he could change his mind he'd knocked on the door.

After several minutes, the door eased open slightly allowing light to pour into the darkened room revealing a sleepy, pajama-clad Samantha. Only then did he realized what time it was. "Can I talk to you?" He asked, there was no backing down now.

She nodded slowly, wiping sleep from her eyes and grabbed a key from the table near the door as she stepped further into the hallway, the door to her room clicking shut behind her.

"Sorry I woke you, but I just can't wait any longer." He admitted, restraining a smile at her disheveled appearance.

"Wait for what, Martin?" She asked through a yawn.

"For you." He answered. "This will likely sound ridiculous because we haven't even seen each other in two years, but I'm going to say it anyway." He paused, taking a deep breath to calm his nerves. "I love you. I don't know why it took you moving to Texas and two years of heartache to realize it, but it did. I tried to move on, tried to get over you, but it's pointless.

You're the one, Sam.

You're the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. And I hope that you'll give me another chance. Another chance to be the man you need me to be, the man you deserve. I gave up on you one time Samantha Spade, and I'm not doing it again." He said brushing an errant strand of hair behind her ear.

"I don't know who this other guy is, but what I do know is that he'll never love you like I love you." He finished, allowing his hand to linger over her cheek.

_I'll never be the same  
I'm caught inside the memories, the promises  
are yesterdays and I belong to you.  
I just can't walk away  
'cause after loving you  
I can never be the same._

She remained silent throughout his speech, absorbing every word he said. Slowly a smile made its way over her lips that reached all the way to her eyes. His fingers drifted over her forehead and cheek as a hesitant smile crept onto his face as well.

She couldn't believe all the words that had poured so sweetly from his lips. After their breakup, she thought any hope of a relationship with Martin was well and gone. But all this time, he'd been waiting for her. Waiting for a chance to love her like he wanted to the first time.

She rested her hands on his shoulders before snaking them around his neck, her fingers running through the silky strands of hair. He followed her lead, allowing his arms to wrap securely around her waist causing a flurry of butterflies to erupt inside her.

Gently she pulled him towards her, finding his lips with her own. The kiss was soft and tender, full of love. As they parted, her eyes met the blue ones she'd missed so much, and in that moment, she knew he was the only man for her.

He waited patiently for her to speak despite the wave of emotion going on inside of him.

"First of all, that other guy is James, and we're not dating. He knows about my past with you and everything that led to my leaving New York, so when he saw you come into the auditorium today he went into protector mode. He's kind of like my Texas version of Danny." She told him, smiling wider as a sigh of relief escaped his lips. "And concerning all the other stuff..." She trailed off, not sure where to even begin. "Ditto." She smiled.

"Ditto?" He questioned with a grin. "I bear my heart and soul to you, and all I get is 'ditto'?"

"Well, I could have said, 'it's 2AM, Martin. Go away.'" She quipped good-naturedly.

"I'll take 'ditto' then."

"I do love you, Marty. More than you'll ever know." She said honestly, resting her head against his shoulder.

She felt rather than heard him laugh as he kissed the top of her head. "See? Now was that so hard?"

"Yeah, yeah." She mumbled into his cotton t-shirt. "Can we please go back to bed now?"

"We?" He asked, tilting his head to meet her eyes.

She took his hand in hers, leading him towards the elevator. "Yes. Come on."

"Where are we going?"

"To your room. Leslie snores."

"Sounds good to me." Martin answered with a smile on his face. He pulled her tightly to him as they stepped into the empty elevator, happy to once again have her in his arms.

He wasn't sure how their future would play out, but he knew they'd get through it. Together.


End file.
